Relationships based on economic reasons are the worst type of relationships. I hardly see the emotional side of it. It is very rational and often face crises perhaps bigger than the global economic crisis. More than that it is a shameful so people call those who seek relationships based only on economic reasons “Gold diggers” these relationships are highly unstable since they are very sensitive to the economic status of people in the relationship.
Although it is often one party to the relationship that seeks benefits from the economic status of the other, they usually have something to offer to the other party.
Lost…
Often I wonder what I’m doing
Aimless thoughts over and over
Routine steps hardly any new
Escape or die decide no later
Trapped in an illusion That things get better
Shake it off and get up Why this seems so hard
I know the reason And so it is sad
Why I don’t follow My own intuition
Doubt is what I fear the most
For what I have paid all through my life
Yet I don’t know the cost of my escape
Nor of any other choice if I have one of course
Thank You!
I wish to thank those who read my blog and send me emails about their views. I really appreciate your readership although I wasn’t expecting it especially when it is not even publicized. I know some of you are regulars, and some just randomly land on my blog. To be honest this blog was not meant to be for others to read but for me to provide a backdrop for my thoughts and reflections on certain things that I prefer not to talk. Considering that most of you are strangers and have similar views like me, I think I quite like the idea of having you reading these posts and commenting on them. Although I do no approve your comments to appear on my posts, I like them very much. So keep them coming.
Who Deserves Who?
One of my friends today told me that if someone continuously keep telling you both directly and indirectly that she doesn’t deserve you, or you deserve better, it means that she wants you to move on, because she is moving on. He had a point. Why on earth otherwise she would say something like that? Because after all if she is sure that she needs you, then she would say so, without keeping you in a pendulum swinging you back and forth treating you like “nobody”.
Posted from WordPress for BlackBerry.
Vicious Cycle..
When you are constantly being played a carefully orchestrated game, by the people you love, everyday you wake up with a chilled feeling inside not knowing, is it going to be another day you will be played. Your want to believe the lie those very same people surrounds you with. Yet some part of you know its a big lie, and the reality is totally different because you know, and once told, that action speak louder than words. The actions are clear, you can see them, hear them and feel them. The lie is to save the face. Because deep down, what they want is to hurt you. But still come clean as if they didnt mean anything.
You know this, yet you try to be patient. Give every possible chance to make it right. Why, because you love them. But they won’t take it. Because they are not real. If they were, they would have taken every chance to make it right and prove you are wrong, and the lie is your own illusion, a feeling of insecurity. But they are silent. You are nothing more than an event in their general priority list. And they make that clear. And thats when it hits you so hard. You wake up. And they.. continue to play you, and You… wait till they take a chance and make it right. Its like a vicious cycle. Hope is what stimulates it. But in the end, you are likely to be disappointed, again and again.
Enough with the negativity.
I realise my life has been negative for a long time and I have missed out on thinking about the so any good things that happens around me. Things that are worthy of spending time reflecting. So this blog needs a makeover.
Seriously!
When I know as a fact that someone is lying, I feel so awful that although there is a sudden impulse to confront her by presenting the facts, yet I feel not to embarrass her. May be I find it cute that she is lying, trying to hide something or, knowing that she is wrong trying to avoid the guilty by lying. Or may be I know that no matter what I say, she will keep lying. For instance, one of my friends was suppose to meet me, but he didn’t. I saw him in a bus going towards where his girlfriend lives. Perhaps he thought of visiting her instead of me. Fare enough, he could have told me. Yet he lied to me saying he was at home busy doing his “general priorities”. And he updated his status that he was busy at home. Little bit over smart. This is a fictional example though. But things like this is very common now. So it’s part of life. But what is irritating is when someone pretending as if she/he cares, yet in reality they consider you far lesser than their “general priorities”.
පිය සටහන්
Countless
I know there is nothing left for me..
Yet my mind is restless..
Thinking of you..countless times..
No real reason I can find..
I know its useless but I cannot..
stop myself falling for you..
All over again.. Again and again..
Everyday and every way..
Useless.. I convince..
Stab my heart and dry my veins..
To see if it stop calling your name..
Keep me closer.. Love me forever..
Be my strength to win the world over..
It never stop crying.. Knowing its useless ..
I guess its the hope.. The biggest illusion of all.
Posted from WordPress for BlackBerry.
Impatient
I feel I have become impatient lately, rushing into things that need time. As the wise old man say, perhaps this is a problem with my age. Or maybe subconsciously I respond to the pressure I have to live with. Now I have decided to actively remind myself that I need to take my time, and not everything need to rushed. Yes, I’m fully aware that it’s not the time to be laid back. Yesterday my father was explaining how things are moving forward so fast, and how the life has become so competitive, that I shouldn’t be wasting time. He is right. But I’m afraid that when you rush, you often make incomplete decisions and altogether wrong ones. I need time to breath and to pull myself together.
Junkyard 